In September 2012, by chance, I found my husband’s cache of child pornography, on his computer. He liked little boys, from the age of about 9 to 16 years old, at most. As soon as I could pick up the phone, I called the police. Twenty minutes later, a very kind police officer came to the door apologising for being a man and offering to wait outside until a woman officer could arrive. (In all my dealings with the police, since, I’ve been impressed by their sensitivity and kindness.) An hour later, that same policeman left the house with the hard drive from my husband’s computer. At two minutes to midnight, I drove away from the home that I had shared with my husband, and our near 16 year marriage, with my little laptop, my jewellery case, two suitcases, £100 and my grandmother’s antique vase – which he knew I loved and which I was afraid he would break when he came home and found me gone. It took 18 months for the case to come to trial. The evening before my husband’s appearance at the local magistrates’ court, my CID liaison officer warned me that he was intending to plead ‘not guilty’ which would mean my attendance at Crown Court, as a witness. The following morning, he pleaded ‘guilty.’
During the three years after I left him, I knew of no-one who had been through this. I found two websites/blogs that were helpful, but they disappeared soon after I first saw them. There were a few books available on Amazon, telling other women’s stories, but none of them showed me HOW to get out of the deepest, darkest hole I’d ever found myself in.
I hope that this blog will become a ‘roadmap’ for women like me, who are suffering in the way that I was, back then… ©